At least—’ ‘Don’t be more of a lunatic than you can help,’ broke in the captain, addressing himself to Melusine. I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. You understand me, I’m sure. She could smell him almost as strongly as she could the new paint on the fire escape walls, along with the wool suit and the weird polyester smell of his wet umbrella. For her it was sufficient to know that somebody wanted her, that never again would she be alone, that always this boy with the dreams would be depending upon her. That he’s come here at all shows he’ll stop at nothing. Her relationship with John had made her the object of desire for scores of teenage boys who had dared not previously think of her in such a way. "'A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other.
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